Wednesday, 2 September 2009 . 20:03

Made to fly…

Losing appetite in an internal excavation
as Void stalks my every sensation.
My coffee’s gone cold and I keep asking why
Only consoled by the fact that angels were made to fly.

A desire to control, to hold my guardian by the wing
To experience the secure presence and that gentle scent of spring!
Straining my voice in vain as loud sounds of silence reply
So I let go to the certainty that angels were made to fly.

by Martine


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Wednesday, 29 July 2009 . 12:52

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Wednesday, 3 June 2009 . 11:46

No words are needed to describe the above. 1 comments

Sunday, 31 May 2009 . 23:46

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Thursday, 28 May 2009 . 10:05

A surgical glove, delicate and frail,
Saves lives in the midst of surgical detail,
The glove, insignificant in its own right,
On the surgeons hand becomes an invincible knight.

If a basketball in my hands lands,
Compared to its value in Jordan’s hands,
Is surely worth not more than a win,
It all depends whose hands it’s in!

Like the captivating tune of a violin,
A delicate sail can catch the wind,
And I absorb the ocean breeze
As my life freely sails across the seas.

I swing lifeless on my trapeze
And surrender to His expertise.
I let go of my hold, unfold my hand,
Secure that in my catcher’s hold I’ll land.

My freedom exposed in an arm’s length
And in this weakness lies my catcher’s strength.

by Martine 1 comments

Sunday, 10 May 2009 . 15:22

below is a quick thank you clip to someone special...

Thank you... lots. You've helped me become who I am today.

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Thursday, 7 May 2009 . 11:24

(Thanks for sharing MC!) 2 comments

Tuesday, 5 May 2009 . 21:07

Came across this extremely touching video. Couldn't not share it. Bring out the tissues...

1 comments

Sunday, 3 May 2009 . 12:07

I'm simply in love with this film, this lifestory, this song... just watch, listen and learn!

Open your on eyes reality... and be thankful for your own life!

1 comments

Wednesday, 29 April 2009 . 10:43

Years ago, a farmer owned land along the Atlantic seacoast.
He constantly advertised for hired hands. Most people were
reluctant to work on farms along the Atlantic. They dreaded the
awful storms that raged across the Atlantic, wreaking havoc on the buildings and crops.
As the farmer interviewed applicants for the job, he received
A steady stream of refusals.

Finally, a short, thin man, well past middle age, approached
the farmer. "Are you a good farm hand?" the farmer asked him.
"Well, I can sleep when the wind blows," answered the little man.
Although puzzled by this answer, the farmer, desperate for help,
Hired him.

The little man worked well around the farm, busy from
dawn to dusk, and the farmer felt satisfied with the man's work.
Then one night the wind howled loudly in from offshore.
Jumping out of bed, the farmer grabbed a lantern and rushed
next door to the hired hand's sleeping quarters. He shook the
little man and yelled, "Get up! A storm is coming!
Tie things down before they blow away!"

The little man rolled over in bed and said firmly, "No
sir. I told you, I can sleep when the wind blows."
Enraged by the response, the farmer was tempted to fire him on
the spot. Instead, he hurried outside to prepare for the storm.

To his amazement, he discovered that all of the haystacks had
been covered with tarpaulins. The cows were in the barn, the chickens
were in the coops, and the doors were barred.
The shutters were tightly secured. Everything was tied down.
Nothing could blow away. The farmer then understood what his
hired hand meant, so he returned to his bed to also sleep while
the wind blew.

Moral of the Story
When you're prepared, spiritually, mentally, and physically,
you have nothing to fear. Can you sleep when the
wind blows through your life?
The hired hand in the story was able to sleep because he
had secured the farm against the storm.
We secure ourselves against the storms of life by
grounding ourselves in the Word of God.
We don't need to understand, we just need to hold
His hand to have peace in the middle of storms. 2 comments

Friday, 10 April 2009 . 08:53

Gethsemane (Matthew 26:36-46)

Then Jesus went with his disciples to a place called Gethsemane, and he said to them, "Sit here while I go over there and pray." He took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with him, and he began to be sorrowful and troubled. Then he said to them, "My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me."
Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, "My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will."
Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. "Could you men not keep watch with me for one hour?" he asked Peter. "Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the body is weak."
He went away a second time and prayed, "My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done."
When he came back, he again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. So he left them and went away once more and prayed the third time, saying the same thing.
Then he returned to the disciples and said to them, "Are you still sleeping and resting? Look, the hour is near, and the Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. Rise, let us go! Here comes my betrayer!"


Last night we had an adoration at St Julian's Church. The adoration was based on the above scripture, and the phrase "watch with me one hour" has been recurring in my head ever since. During the one hour adoration, I kept questionning myself "would I sit with Him one hour?". Suddenly, I felt myself drowning in a million thoughts, and I could picture myself sitting with Jesus for a while, then running away out of fear. I'm sure I would have been one of the disciples asleep during Jesus' most heartbreaking moments in the garden. Do I love Jesus enough to stay awake with Him, to hurt when He hurts, to cry when He cries?
It is very easy to sit awake with someone you care about so dearly such as a best friend, brother, sister, father, mother. But then I thought about the fact that I love Jesus as much as I love my most distant brother, because there is Jesus in every single person I know and meet. So I thought about people I don't get along with too well, and I wondered whether or not I would sit up with them in moments of despair. Would I?
I got deeply in touch with that feeling, and with that same feeling still vivid in my heart, I then sat awake with Jesus for an hour, in worship, in love, in grief for all He went through for each one of us.... for YOU... for ME!



1 comments

Sunday, 5 April 2009 . 17:43

Strangers meet on an ordinary day,
Ordinarily minding their every which way.
Two worlds; opposing directions,
Each of them caught up in abyss reflection.

When the daily rush is ignored,
Their thoughts are explored,
Expressed and confessed,
Whilst the heart protests.

One look at what the stranger noted
And scribbled there my own heart is quoted;
My emotions stolen by a gentle thief
Who transformed them in a symphony of tender grief.

A realization of an emotion beyond any philosophy,
Reading in someone’s life my own autobiography,
I feel lost, awed by our own immensity and complexion.
And through one verse, full comprehension,

Tapping my feet to the beat in the street;
An amplified connection; pure and complete.
Through an inspired script
A true friendship is lipped.

A scribbled tear, a broken wing,
Two poets find themselves in each other’s writing,
And the explosion of nuclear rhyme
Creates a tie ahead of time.

1 comments

Saturday, 4 April 2009 . 15:46

I've been on a very looooooooooooong thought process since my last blog.
lots and lots of thoughts... course especially.... is this course really what I should be doing? Am i good enough to be a social worker? am I too sensitive? Are there too many issues related to my past for me to be able to look ahead? self-awareness, assertiveness, listening, empathy, the whole lot is bursting out of my ears! Social Work is not an easy course at all, its a constant struggle with oneself and with society. Some people actually ask "Ara.. you need a degree to become a Social Worker?" ... ^-_-^ (hurts much...)
I knew a passion, so deep and so sincere, of protecting children's rights and making sure they grow strong looking ahead towards a future they build themselves, and being able to encourage others and help them find the rope to pull themselves out of the dumps they may find themselves in.... this same passion pushed me towards Social Work as a course.. as a profession...
On the way, motivation was left behind, and often there are days when the passion simply disappears. Thankfully, God has planned a group of us student social workers to accidentally befriend eachother. This friendship is growing, strong and steady, and we're there for one another to turn our back on the past, focus on the present, and point towards the future.
I truly do believe that God has a plan for me through this course, even though its beyond anything I can think of right now. I keep walking, one step after another, one at a time, experiencing every moment, allowing NOTHING to go passed me without it being noticed, looked at, thought upon.
I keep hanging onto God's plan, trusting Him at every blind step I take...
Somehow, despite the struggles, apathy, frustration and all, my heart finds itself at home in this course. I'll just keep praying for me to be sensitive to what God has in mind! 2 comments

Monday, 30 March 2009 . 18:18

On special request, here's the poem that was read at "Tear It Down".

Hero - by Tine

I’m ordinary, Like a canary,
trapped in a cage of canaries,
All the same, except our name,
We’re lame, we swim in shame, we’re all to blame,
and our aim is solely to win the game...
We do anything in our might to make our wishes come true
And if we hurt someone, then boo-hoo screw you!
The world has become all dark and low
And the more we grow the lower we go
It’s like a vicious cycle, a bottomless well
Where selfishness reigns and where we are destined to hell!

We’re drowning suffocating giving up on climbing up,
We need someone big enough to pull us up.
But who can it be if we’re all in this sea
All in the same damn wreckage sinking deep?

Here’s where the light shines bright in the night
You see? We cannot possibly set ourselves free.
We need a saviour, someone to go the extra mile
And in a little while we become versatile!
It’s all about setting our fine pride aside
About asking for help, for God to provide
For him to decide to merge the divide:
That defied slide, the one found worldwide.

Comics portray heros in plasticky suits
With gloves, a mask and leather boots.
These comic heros are fake, they’re all invented
Sci-Fi filled with discontented and demented,
But our hero, no, He’s the only one
To save mankind He didn’t need a gun
But through His love for His only son
Who died for us, salvation is won...
The shackles that bind us to sin are undone
And a new life has gladly begun!

Our Hero... He saves the lowest of low, the poorest of poor, friend or foe...
He’s our hero!

3 comments

Thursday, 12 March 2009 . 12:57

So, last time I just posted this video really quickly becaude it struck me, and now I have the time for an explanation! :)
In life, veeeeery often, we find ourselves contemplating about our future. Sometimes we have no idea where we're heading, other times we just want to get there as soon as possible. Often the patience we need to gradually arrive to our destination runs short, and worries and fears bombared our brain!
That is when this song came into the scene. I was talking to a friend of mine about how worried i am about my course, about how many dreams and aspirations I have and how I currently feel this course is not taking me anywhere close to them... so my friend gave me the link to this video, and it was the long-awaited answer to my endless prayers! :)

2 comments

Friday, 6 March 2009 . 16:14

I love God! I love His constant presence, His everlasting Love, His gentleness, kindness, wisdom and His Fatherly Embrace. The prodigal Son story fascinates me and always will. The son asks his father for his share of the inheritance and sets off to find His own way. Lately its been the same with me and God, I asked for my space, and he permitted it. When the son realised that he would only be happy and fulfilled in his Father's presence back at home, he returned. And so I return too. I returned and found God's loving embrace waiting for me.

I did not physically leave to anywhere, but I walked enough of a distance to feel that I'm nothing and nobody without God. The lenten talks are coming up, and I haven't been so excited about something in quite a while! It's an awesome opportunity to spread God's love and to share our experiences of God with others. Its an opportunity to give hope to the hopeless and love the unloved as well as to open a door to those who find themselves face to the wall.

My heart is burdened because in the career i chose, Social work, I cannot share my values with my clients, and I cannot speak about God and encourage people by telling them about how God's love changed me. But i know I can still touch their lives in different ways, through my actions, my understanding, my listening and my care. God knows where He is leading each and every one of us ... if we could only trust in His lead!!!

"come to me all who are heavy burdened, and I shall give you rest..."
he doesn't only give rest, but he also gives a fresh burst of energy and new life!

2 comments

Thursday, 5 March 2009 . 20:36

Life’s a bitch, life is tough,
It’s easy to grumble, huff and puff,
Sadly situations pain us deep within,
Which often forbid us from wearing a grin.

We feel angry and sad give the world our back,
To hide in the shadows we dress in black,
We frown we cringe for a day or two,
And people ask “why are you blue?”

Then comes the day when you hit the bottom,
When you hit yourself hard on the ground,
The day when you feel most forgotten,
You learn a lesson so profound

A tap on the shoulder, a good slap in the face,
An outstretched arm, a warm embrace,
A listening ear, an encouraging smile,
A hand to hold on that extra mile,

A word of wisdom, a steady presence,
A patient soul, a comforting silence,
A shelter, a rest, a shoulder to cry on,
A soothing light, a breaking dawn,

I thank you my friend for being by my side,
For being patient and walking my stride,
I thank you for loving and believing in me,
And foreseeing from now what I’m meant to be

I’ll carry an umbrella to shelter from the rain,
I’ll go to a doctor and heal the pain,
I promise I’ll hang on and hold my head high,
I’ll spread my wings, I’m ready to fly.

I promise I’m here if you’re ever in need,
I’ll push you on to help you succeed,
I’ll pick you up if you ever fall,
And help you climb over the wall,

We are both fallen angels, missing one wing,
We walk these streets thirsting the sky,
So if we lean on one another and join our strengths,
Together, as one, we can fly!


By Martine 0 comments

Wednesday, 4 March 2009 . 18:48

So I've been having a rough time. Things in life are a little haywire at the moment, and I feel exhausted from struggling with the situations life throws at me. So I kind of politely, and gently, asked God for some space because I felt I was off tangent with my prayers and anything I did for Him was not heartfelt. And that's what I did. I gave myself some space, some thinking time, however still keeping God at a close distance not totally our of the picture.
And honestly, at this point in time I love God more than I have ever loved Him before. I've come to a realisation, that God truly does know us. i mean, think about urself, u act differently with different people, but u remain urself at the same time. its just your approach that changes because people act and behave differently.
Well I believe God does the same. He remains the loving God that He is, but his approach is a little different with each one of us, although His love is unconditional with each one of us.
so myself, as a person, if i get hurt i need a 'time-out', i need my space. And God knows that. So He does give me space. I musn't feel guilty about reacting in these ways with God, coz its who i am, its my true self, its the unmasked me, and God knows that and He surely honours it.
Eventually I will reach a point in my relationship with God when I wouldn't need space from Him, because He and He alone will be all I need at any given time and in any situation. And I truly do pray to reach such a point in life one day... 2 comments “Are you upset little friend? Have you been lying awake worrying? Well, don't worry...I'm here. The flood waters will recede, the famine will end, the sun will shine tomorrow, and I will always be here to take care of you." - Charlie Brown to Snoopy
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Saturday, 28 February 2009 . 17:23

The toughest times bring the roughest thoughts, and its hard to see the sun when you're walking through a noisy, dark, fumed up tunnel. Sure there are odd electrical lights signalling the way, but some of them are bust, broken, flickering. Rainbows only happen when rainstorm and sunshine collide. The silver lining can only be seen when a dark cloud is covering the sun.

When we cannot see beyond our reach due to fog and mist, all we can do is have faith. We must reach out, and grab hold of The Hand that will guide us through, The Hand that Holds the world.




The poet in me

Electrical power charged up within
Voltage rising beneath the skin
Blood shoots rapidly through the veins
Breaking speeds of electric trains
Taking orders from the brain
To escape far away from pain.
It’s all within, oblivious to Man,
An automatic reaction ever since Life began.
Feelings, emotions beyond control
As we try to jump out of the big black hole.
Anxiety stresses and pressures the hurt
Which tugs and fights and rolls in the dirt
It tries to set itself free from the chains
Stabbing the knife deepening the pain
To produce a crack in the system
A bruised limb, the lights dim,
At the speed of light
The inspiration to write
An evolution ahead of time,
From pain to words, syllables, rhyme,
Hurts and memories to ink on paper
From ice, to water, to vapor,
Unimaginable to the human eye
Whatever the heart cry
The limit’s the sky
To every “why” there’s no reply
This I cannot deny.
But as each letter is drawn
It becomes a swan,
A graceful beauty under the sun’s lighting
As I compose this piece of writing,
My soul exposed, heart in hand,
An art I don’t understand,
As I feel torn and forlorn, I mourn,
And the poet in me is born. 1 comments